[ She already killed the man once. It just didn't stick the first time, and her feelings for Childe now are different than whatever they were before. Her emotions flare for a second before they die back down.
There's something almost like bitterness, but it's not exactly at him, not all at him, and she shakes her head. ]
If you were going to be sorry, you shouldn't have done it in the first place. Was that your idea of justice?
[ . . . . he shakes his head and then - there's something a bit more solid. a bit more firm as he answers.]
No. I'm not sorry I did it. I don't regret killing him - because he was disappointed it was me, and he went out in the most boring way possible.
There's a lot of things I'm sorry for that are consequences - how you feel, how Endorsi feels - but I won't suggest I have second thoughts about what I chose to do. That's not right, when it's something as serious as killing.
[ But at least Mineo isn't backing down. It's better that he's firm in that. It's a resolve that she accepts.
She would have been angrier otherwise. ]
I'm fine that he went out in a boring way. [ And she really is fine with that. Her feeling isn't necessarily something that can be called sincere, but it's not a lie.
She sighs. ]
But I think you should be more concerned about Endorsi's feelings than mine.
[ . . . . he looks out at the ocean at that and there's - a bit of confusion. he really thought that medb would demand more for him but.]
.... she's one of my closest friends. I'm concerned about her feelings in a - different way than I'm concerned about yours.
[a beat]
.... you can ask what you want from me, you know. [just since she hasn't seemed to deal out a punishment yet] I - really try not to just be talk. I know I did something that hurt you, no matter what your feelings are about Childe now.
Oh. Once we're done talking, I'm going to hit you.
[ She isn't asking. She's going to do it. ]
But Mineo, did you think I thought he'd outlast that week? [ There is almost a bitter amusement at that. ] The moment I saw him alive on Sunday, I knew he wouldn't. Whether it really was Childe who revived himself or not... I knew he'd end up dead again.
It's more that you all seemed to try wanting to jail him instead of outright saying that you'd just kill him.
It's hypocritical of the others, but at least you confessed when everyone else before now hasn't. [ What about Law? Who the fuck is Law. ] And you were upfront on Tuesday.
[ She's angry at him for reasons but less angry for other reasons he probably doesn't expect. ]
[nodding easily. yeah. okay cool he deserves that and honestly he feels a little relieved to know that there is a punch coming his way. it's easier for him to understand than everyone being nice to him? please, punch murderers, guys.
but.]
.... I didn't want to introduce too much new evidence that was unrelated - like I said, it was a pretty boring kill. I obscured the bullet wound just so that it wouldn't be so obvious that everyone who wants me to fight for my life would be furious with me.
But... I thought that if I added too many unknown elements, I could accidentally implicate someone innocent? And then I would've had to confess, because I'd never let someone take the fall for me.
So it was just... old, familiar stuff that we never solved so I knew it wouldn't point to anyone. [he frowns] Though I regret some of that now... It came across more hurtful than I intended.
[he really is so stupid sometimes also i, dana, oocly wanted a shitpost murder]
[ Medb is not nice and has never been a nice person, so Mineo doesn't need to worry there. Her reasons for hitting him have very little to do with any kind of justice, though. ]
I wouldn't call it hurtful.
[ It's more exasperation. ]
Everyone here is quite selfish, you know. You might be self-flagellating, but what are you going to do when people are going to let you walk around like you didn't murder someone?
[if he's going to be extremely honest - that's about half of the reason why he's literally at the beach dealing with this fucking hurricane of emotions]
Satoru was right - I was wondering if I deserved to be in the jail cell, but no one's asked? [it's funny because what gojou said that upset mineo that much was actually right out in the open] I'm supposed to just... keep going about my business unless someone feels like stabbing me...? I guess...?
[ . . . . he just - sighs at that. and maybe they've had this discussion before but at least compared to previous weeks, he seems to have wrestled with this question more. a little more prepared to answer.]
No. [a beat] ... I don't know if justice exists anywhere. Not in the way that it should, at least - or at least... how I think it should.
[a justice that is truly fair, that makes sure that those who do wrong are punished, and those who try their best to save others or themselves are lifted up. because he doesn't even know what fair is, or what that looks like]
And maybe it's dumb to think about - because I wouldn't let myself be stabbed anyway. I'd still fight back, even knowing the reasons and that I deserve it.
But I guess I just still don't like any of it, even knowing how it is.
[ There is a beat of faint approval. Whether or not Medb agrees, she thinks this is an acceptable answer. ]
Justice doesn't exist here. You're proof of that.
[ She says that simply. It's the truth. Mineo is visible and tangible proof that it's bias and not fairness that reigns here. ]
You don't have to like the reality. No one says you have to accept it even if you recognize it, you know. What people want and how people move to try to attain it—can't we see it here every week?
I'd fight to live even if everyone else thought what I wanted was wrong. There can be personal justice here, but that's it.
[there's a nod at that, and hearing it articulated in those words makes it easier for him to parse through at least. though there's a beat of amusement - ]
I don't know if I deserve to be receiving your help to sort through my stuff, Queen Medb, even if it's unintentional?
[because... it does help. and he finds himself picking up a handful of sand, letting it sift through his fingers]
... Personal justice is probably as far as I'll get with it. A justice that can actually be held as an ideal is... probably too hard to reach for. At least the way that things are.
Those were my own views. [ If they help others, cool. If they don't, also cool. ] But I try my best to live in a way I'll never regret. It doesn't really have much consideration for justice as an ideal at the end of the day.
Hitting you is more for my satisfaction than anything else.
[honestly all of this is entirely what he expected and he nods. medb would never help him on purpose and he is also fine with that. he still respects her so much]
I still think that's pretty cool of you. [a beat] The - living without regrets thing. Not the hitting me thing.
[HE HISSES AND CURSES UNDER HIS BREATH but otherwise he doesn't actually seem to do much. he presses a hand against where he was hit immediately out of reflex, and does seem like he's prepared to jump back in case she wants to hit him again but]
Fuck. Okay. Deserved. Give me a second.
[he'll understand if punishment gets worse but let him catch his breath at least]
wheezes a little bit and - okay, the mention of takeru brings a level of emotional pain into this, like he's been stabbed a bit. the guilt is much more poignant, and a lot more focused.]
[she can point at him all she wants - for some reason this is what gets mineo's backbone to show up a little as a flare of some odd protectiveness jumps out. it's hard to say what for, but it doesn't seem to be for himself]
... that it's between me and him, and I don't need to be told how to work with my partner.
I know you care, Queen Medb, and I appreciate it - I always appreciate when people care about Takeru.
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There's something almost like bitterness, but it's not exactly at him, not all at him, and she shakes her head. ]
If you were going to be sorry, you shouldn't have done it in the first place. Was that your idea of justice?
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No. I'm not sorry I did it. I don't regret killing him - because he was disappointed it was me, and he went out in the most boring way possible.
There's a lot of things I'm sorry for that are consequences - how you feel, how Endorsi feels - but I won't suggest I have second thoughts about what I chose to do. That's not right, when it's something as serious as killing.
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[ But at least Mineo isn't backing down. It's better that he's firm in that. It's a resolve that she accepts.
She would have been angrier otherwise. ]
I'm fine that he went out in a boring way. [ And she really is fine with that. Her feeling isn't necessarily something that can be called sincere, but it's not a lie.
She sighs. ]
But I think you should be more concerned about Endorsi's feelings than mine.
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.... she's one of my closest friends. I'm concerned about her feelings in a - different way than I'm concerned about yours.
[a beat]
.... you can ask what you want from me, you know. [just since she hasn't seemed to deal out a punishment yet] I - really try not to just be talk. I know I did something that hurt you, no matter what your feelings are about Childe now.
I want to make up for that.
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[ She isn't asking. She's going to do it. ]
But Mineo, did you think I thought he'd outlast that week? [ There is almost a bitter amusement at that. ] The moment I saw him alive on Sunday, I knew he wouldn't. Whether it really was Childe who revived himself or not... I knew he'd end up dead again.
It's more that you all seemed to try wanting to jail him instead of outright saying that you'd just kill him.
It's hypocritical of the others, but at least you confessed when everyone else before now hasn't. [ What about Law? Who the fuck is Law. ] And you were upfront on Tuesday.
[ She's angry at him for reasons but less angry for other reasons he probably doesn't expect. ]
Tell me why you had to make it that stupid.
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but.]
.... I didn't want to introduce too much new evidence that was unrelated - like I said, it was a pretty boring kill. I obscured the bullet wound just so that it wouldn't be so obvious that everyone who wants me to fight for my life would be furious with me.
But... I thought that if I added too many unknown elements, I could accidentally implicate someone innocent? And then I would've had to confess, because I'd never let someone take the fall for me.
So it was just... old, familiar stuff that we never solved so I knew it wouldn't point to anyone. [he frowns] Though I regret some of that now... It came across more hurtful than I intended.
[he really is so stupid sometimes also i, dana, oocly wanted a shitpost murder]
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I wouldn't call it hurtful.
[ It's more exasperation. ]
Everyone here is quite selfish, you know. You might be self-flagellating, but what are you going to do when people are going to let you walk around like you didn't murder someone?
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[if he's going to be extremely honest - that's about half of the reason why he's literally at the beach dealing with this fucking hurricane of emotions]
Satoru was right - I was wondering if I deserved to be in the jail cell, but no one's asked? [it's funny because what gojou said that upset mineo that much was actually right out in the open] I'm supposed to just... keep going about my business unless someone feels like stabbing me...? I guess...?
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Do you really think someone's going to stab you? Or that anyone is going ask you to walk into a jail cell?
No one pointed a finger at you. I didn't, and I was reasonably sure.
[ She shakes her head. ]
Do you think justice exists here?
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No. [a beat] ... I don't know if justice exists anywhere. Not in the way that it should, at least - or at least... how I think it should.
[a justice that is truly fair, that makes sure that those who do wrong are punished, and those who try their best to save others or themselves are lifted up. because he doesn't even know what fair is, or what that looks like]
And maybe it's dumb to think about - because I wouldn't let myself be stabbed anyway. I'd still fight back, even knowing the reasons and that I deserve it.
But I guess I just still don't like any of it, even knowing how it is.
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Justice doesn't exist here. You're proof of that.
[ She says that simply. It's the truth. Mineo is visible and tangible proof that it's bias and not fairness that reigns here. ]
You don't have to like the reality. No one says you have to accept it even if you recognize it, you know. What people want and how people move to try to attain it—can't we see it here every week?
I'd fight to live even if everyone else thought what I wanted was wrong. There can be personal justice here, but that's it.
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I don't know if I deserve to be receiving your help to sort through my stuff, Queen Medb, even if it's unintentional?
[because... it does help. and he finds himself picking up a handful of sand, letting it sift through his fingers]
... Personal justice is probably as far as I'll get with it. A justice that can actually be held as an ideal is... probably too hard to reach for. At least the way that things are.
It's just making decisions that we can live with.
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It was unintentional.
[ She is still a mean girl. ]
Those were my own views. [ If they help others, cool. If they don't, also cool. ] But I try my best to live in a way I'll never regret. It doesn't really have much consideration for justice as an ideal at the end of the day.
Hitting you is more for my satisfaction than anything else.
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I still think that's pretty cool of you. [a beat] The - living without regrets thing. Not the hitting me thing.
I'll just deal with the violence.
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I bet you're beating yourself up enough, but...
[ She gestures for him to come closer.
She's not nice enough to not hit him. ]
Some people would love to be whipped by me, you know.
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Despite popular opinion, I'm really not into that.
But I accept my consequences.
[just. his expression darkens but he does approach her. he at least seems to be steeling himself enough to accept whatever hit comes his way]
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[ She heard.
Prepare to be hit by riding crop, Mineo. I'm so sorry even if Medb isn't. She angles it for his torso. It's going to leave a nasty bruise. ]
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[HE HISSES AND CURSES UNDER HIS BREATH but otherwise he doesn't actually seem to do much. he presses a hand against where he was hit immediately out of reflex, and does seem like he's prepared to jump back in case she wants to hit him again but]
Fuck. Okay. Deserved. Give me a second.
[he'll understand if punishment gets worse but let him catch his breath at least]
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Yeah, it really was deserved, but that's all of the physical punishment I have for you.
[ She waves a hand. ]
But you must have done something bad to get Takeru that angry.
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just
wheezes a little bit and - okay, the mention of takeru brings a level of emotional pain into this, like he's been stabbed a bit. the guilt is much more poignant, and a lot more focused.]
.... he's -
Always angry at me.
[okay now he's just being obtuse on purpose]
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You're stupid, but you're not that stupid.
[ She points at him with her riding crop. ]
What do you have to say for yourself?
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... that it's between me and him, and I don't need to be told how to work with my partner.
I know you care, Queen Medb, and I appreciate it - I always appreciate when people care about Takeru.
But doing right by him is all I care about too.
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That's not what I was criticizing. [ Not exactly. ] But if you can work it out, all right.
And Endorsi?
[ She walked away, looking quite angry after his confession, after all. ]
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... yeah. I know that we have stuff to work out between us - but I don't plan on letting things stay bad.
[a beat, and then with a note of appreciation]
You really care about her, huh?