[ . . . . he just - sighs at that. and maybe they've had this discussion before but at least compared to previous weeks, he seems to have wrestled with this question more. a little more prepared to answer.]
No. [a beat] ... I don't know if justice exists anywhere. Not in the way that it should, at least - or at least... how I think it should.
[a justice that is truly fair, that makes sure that those who do wrong are punished, and those who try their best to save others or themselves are lifted up. because he doesn't even know what fair is, or what that looks like]
And maybe it's dumb to think about - because I wouldn't let myself be stabbed anyway. I'd still fight back, even knowing the reasons and that I deserve it.
But I guess I just still don't like any of it, even knowing how it is.
[ There is a beat of faint approval. Whether or not Medb agrees, she thinks this is an acceptable answer. ]
Justice doesn't exist here. You're proof of that.
[ She says that simply. It's the truth. Mineo is visible and tangible proof that it's bias and not fairness that reigns here. ]
You don't have to like the reality. No one says you have to accept it even if you recognize it, you know. What people want and how people move to try to attain it—can't we see it here every week?
I'd fight to live even if everyone else thought what I wanted was wrong. There can be personal justice here, but that's it.
[there's a nod at that, and hearing it articulated in those words makes it easier for him to parse through at least. though there's a beat of amusement - ]
I don't know if I deserve to be receiving your help to sort through my stuff, Queen Medb, even if it's unintentional?
[because... it does help. and he finds himself picking up a handful of sand, letting it sift through his fingers]
... Personal justice is probably as far as I'll get with it. A justice that can actually be held as an ideal is... probably too hard to reach for. At least the way that things are.
Those were my own views. [ If they help others, cool. If they don't, also cool. ] But I try my best to live in a way I'll never regret. It doesn't really have much consideration for justice as an ideal at the end of the day.
Hitting you is more for my satisfaction than anything else.
[honestly all of this is entirely what he expected and he nods. medb would never help him on purpose and he is also fine with that. he still respects her so much]
I still think that's pretty cool of you. [a beat] The - living without regrets thing. Not the hitting me thing.
[HE HISSES AND CURSES UNDER HIS BREATH but otherwise he doesn't actually seem to do much. he presses a hand against where he was hit immediately out of reflex, and does seem like he's prepared to jump back in case she wants to hit him again but]
Fuck. Okay. Deserved. Give me a second.
[he'll understand if punishment gets worse but let him catch his breath at least]
wheezes a little bit and - okay, the mention of takeru brings a level of emotional pain into this, like he's been stabbed a bit. the guilt is much more poignant, and a lot more focused.]
[she can point at him all she wants - for some reason this is what gets mineo's backbone to show up a little as a flare of some odd protectiveness jumps out. it's hard to say what for, but it doesn't seem to be for himself]
... that it's between me and him, and I don't need to be told how to work with my partner.
I know you care, Queen Medb, and I appreciate it - I always appreciate when people care about Takeru.
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no subject
No. [a beat] ... I don't know if justice exists anywhere. Not in the way that it should, at least - or at least... how I think it should.
[a justice that is truly fair, that makes sure that those who do wrong are punished, and those who try their best to save others or themselves are lifted up. because he doesn't even know what fair is, or what that looks like]
And maybe it's dumb to think about - because I wouldn't let myself be stabbed anyway. I'd still fight back, even knowing the reasons and that I deserve it.
But I guess I just still don't like any of it, even knowing how it is.
no subject
Justice doesn't exist here. You're proof of that.
[ She says that simply. It's the truth. Mineo is visible and tangible proof that it's bias and not fairness that reigns here. ]
You don't have to like the reality. No one says you have to accept it even if you recognize it, you know. What people want and how people move to try to attain it—can't we see it here every week?
I'd fight to live even if everyone else thought what I wanted was wrong. There can be personal justice here, but that's it.
no subject
I don't know if I deserve to be receiving your help to sort through my stuff, Queen Medb, even if it's unintentional?
[because... it does help. and he finds himself picking up a handful of sand, letting it sift through his fingers]
... Personal justice is probably as far as I'll get with it. A justice that can actually be held as an ideal is... probably too hard to reach for. At least the way that things are.
It's just making decisions that we can live with.
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It was unintentional.
[ She is still a mean girl. ]
Those were my own views. [ If they help others, cool. If they don't, also cool. ] But I try my best to live in a way I'll never regret. It doesn't really have much consideration for justice as an ideal at the end of the day.
Hitting you is more for my satisfaction than anything else.
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I still think that's pretty cool of you. [a beat] The - living without regrets thing. Not the hitting me thing.
I'll just deal with the violence.
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I bet you're beating yourself up enough, but...
[ She gestures for him to come closer.
She's not nice enough to not hit him. ]
Some people would love to be whipped by me, you know.
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Despite popular opinion, I'm really not into that.
But I accept my consequences.
[just. his expression darkens but he does approach her. he at least seems to be steeling himself enough to accept whatever hit comes his way]
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[ She heard.
Prepare to be hit by riding crop, Mineo. I'm so sorry even if Medb isn't. She angles it for his torso. It's going to leave a nasty bruise. ]
no subject
[HE HISSES AND CURSES UNDER HIS BREATH but otherwise he doesn't actually seem to do much. he presses a hand against where he was hit immediately out of reflex, and does seem like he's prepared to jump back in case she wants to hit him again but]
Fuck. Okay. Deserved. Give me a second.
[he'll understand if punishment gets worse but let him catch his breath at least]
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Yeah, it really was deserved, but that's all of the physical punishment I have for you.
[ She waves a hand. ]
But you must have done something bad to get Takeru that angry.
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just
wheezes a little bit and - okay, the mention of takeru brings a level of emotional pain into this, like he's been stabbed a bit. the guilt is much more poignant, and a lot more focused.]
.... he's -
Always angry at me.
[okay now he's just being obtuse on purpose]
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You're stupid, but you're not that stupid.
[ She points at him with her riding crop. ]
What do you have to say for yourself?
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... that it's between me and him, and I don't need to be told how to work with my partner.
I know you care, Queen Medb, and I appreciate it - I always appreciate when people care about Takeru.
But doing right by him is all I care about too.
no subject
That's not what I was criticizing. [ Not exactly. ] But if you can work it out, all right.
And Endorsi?
[ She walked away, looking quite angry after his confession, after all. ]
no subject
... yeah. I know that we have stuff to work out between us - but I don't plan on letting things stay bad.
[a beat, and then with a note of appreciation]
You really care about her, huh?